This ablog about showing love and appreciation for all the work your partner provides to help you manage your diabetes treatment
Happy This, Happy That
How often do we say, “Happy” this, “Happy” that and then continue to do what we have always done? Continue with the routine of our daily lives doing things, intended and unintended to distance ourselves from our partner?
When have we taken the time to show our appreciation for the person at our side who has stuck with us through thick and thin, with possibly some hard landings, got up and started all over again?
In this article, I will muse about Valentine’s Day, which I put right up there with Christmas. I would suggest that about 50% of us” have not taken the time to show their appreciation.
Why 50%? Because that is the divorce and separation rate in Canada. If the opposite action were true, do you think we would have such a failure rate? I do not, but we do.
What Is Valentine’s Day?
Valentine’s Day, also called St. Valentine’s Day, reflects and demonstrates how much you love and value your partner with expressions of greetings and gifts. It is a day when little things matter. It is a day when thoughtfulness is much more appropriate than largess.
A friend of mine came over last night and showed me what his wife had given him. Simple, made with kindness and love, the words strike right from the heart. My friend has been on the right track, doing the things that bind his marriage.
Happy as a clam, I asked him if there were things he would “take back?” His response was, “why would I even waste time thinking about taking back when my wife gives me a love note like that?” He hit the nail right on the head.
What are His Secrets?
Sitting comfortably in our living room, looking over the city, the wind howling, freezing, and slamming our building, I asked my friend, “what is your secret?”
A chuckle, a little roll of a belly laugh. He said, “that is something I think of every day, and I keep it simple.” He explained that love is not complicated unless you make it difficult. He continued, “it is about acting, not reacting, paying attention, being truthful, affirming your relationship and showing appreciation.” He described some of the things he does.
Acting, Not Reacting Do not be in a hurry to incite an argument. Take your time to think about what you want to say and think about “do you want to die on that hill?” How hard is it to take a breath before speaking rather than matching your partner's negative tone and reaction? How hard would it be to defuse a situation by suggesting, “I appreciate what you are saying and thank you for sharing.” Consider the last argument with your partner in defence of this approach. Did you convince them you were right, and they were wrong? I doubt it. So, why get into the debate when there is nowhere to go but downhill?
Paying Attention
Paying attention when his wife wants to talk. He said, “I even go as far as turning off my cell phone, as I know that could be my biggest distraction.” There is a lesson to be learned here and addressed in our recent blog, DamnDiabetes.ca / Bring Back that Loving Feeling.
Being Truthful “Liar, liar pants on fire.” Our kids used to say that. You should never want to lock yourself in a corner by lying to your partner. Even the smallest can turn into a big one. Have your partner thinking “once” that you lied, and they will always have that nagging feeling about anything else you suggest. My friend said, “no matter how difficult the truth is, it is better to deal with the truth than deal with a lie first and then the truth.”
Affirming Your Relationship Notice what your partner does around the home, even if asked to. Let them know you very much appreciate the things they do. Affirmation is showing and telling your partner they did good. How hard is it to say to your partner, “Thanks for the help; I appreciate it?”
Showing Appreciation The fun part. The day is over. You have cleaned up from your diabetes diet meal, and now time to relax and show appreciation. Curl up on the sofa together. What a fantastic way to end the day.
Conclusion
Living with diabetes is not a simple task. There is much to the treatment of diabetes, and it is even more difficult if you conflict with your partner. You can control how you act and have a better quality of life living with diabetes; from Damndiabetes.ca, we hope these suggestions help. If you have any questions, please contact Wayne Drury at (604) 788 7261 or by email at wayne@damndiabetes.ca for a no-obligation consultation.
Best wishes from all of us ...
Wayne Drury was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes over one year ago. He was frustrated with the lack of usable information on diabetes treatment and how to lower blood sugar effectively. His passion now, using all he has learned through his diabetes research, is helping others on a path to a better quality of life living with diabetes. Contact Wayne today to get help with your journey dealing with diabetes.
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